Madame Whiplash
(discretion guaranteed,
one hundred quid a session)
lies on the floor of her kitchen,
crimson pouring from
the gash in her forehead,
the gash in her forehead,
the cat she tripped over
still impaled
on her eight-inch stiletto.
Downstairs,
in the basement,
the flabby-buttocked politician,
manacled to the wall
by wrists and ankles,
clad only in black PVC mask
and matching boots,
waits
and wonders if this is
what she meant
by “exquisite torture”.
Jonathan Pinnock was born in Bedfordshire, England and – despite having so far visited over forty other countries – has failed to relocate any further away than the equally dull next-door county of Hertfordshire. He is married with two children, several cats and a 1961 Ami Continental jukebox. He finds poetry a little baffling, although he has had work published in Ink, Sweat and Tears, Every Day Poets and Twisted Tongue, and he was recently shortlisted for a Leaf Books competition. His unimaginatively-titled yet moderately interesting website may be found at www.jonathanpinnock.com.
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Posted on October 26, 2009 in Humour/Satire
16 Responses to “EXQUISITE TORTURE • by Jonathan Pinnock”
Comments
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October 26th, 2009 at 2:19 am
Enjoyed this dark and gory, yet humorous poem. Thanks.
October 26th, 2009 at 2:54 am
Despite its dealings with death, this poem made me laugh! I enjoyed the read and images.
October 26th, 2009 at 4:02 am
You had me hooked at “flabby-buttocked.” Wickedly fun.
October 26th, 2009 at 6:28 am
Feeling sorry for the impaled cat.
October 26th, 2009 at 7:36 am
I guess discretion can’t save one from everything.
10:35 AM EST
October 26th, 2009 at 8:26 am
Awesome. The fact that it was a politician makes it even better! Great work!
October 26th, 2009 at 9:12 am
Angel:
He had me hooked at Whiplash.
Exquisite is indeed the word for this, Jon. It’s perfect.
October 26th, 2009 at 11:03 am
Jon whips us into a frenzy again.
You naughty boy.
October 26th, 2009 at 11:53 am
Aaaw, poor cat.
October 26th, 2009 at 12:16 pm
Fantastic!
I nearly enjoyed reading J’s bio as much as the poem.
October 26th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
AH if only our current crop of politician had anything like enough personality to visit Miss Whiplash! Our lot probably think it’s the height of decadence to put full cream milk in their lattes. excellent little effort Jon!
October 26th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
A fitting end–not the cat, the fat-arsed politician.
–dj
October 26th, 2009 at 4:51 pm
Thanks for the comments, everyone! Glad you enjoyed it. And I do feel really bad about the cat …
October 27th, 2009 at 2:24 am
I read it to my cat. Told her that’s what happens to cats that get under people’s feet! Don’t think she was listening though – she just purred…
October 27th, 2009 at 4:45 am
October 29th, 2009 at 1:40 pm
I enjoyed this piece tremendously.